It's so crazy to think about how much things have changed since I've written in this blog... Since 2009 I have gotten a divorce from Dustin after a very long time of heart ache and worry for willows happiness. I never thought that I would ever get a divorce. especially because I truly felt like Dustin was my soul mate. But after seeing the way he acted after we decided to have a child I know I did the right thing. Even if it did hurt.
He started seeing other women and staying out late. He was working at a bar at the time so he thought that gave him an excuse which it didn't. He started treating me like every thing he was doing was my fault. He told me that he was staying out late because i was driving him crzy. All i wanted from him was to be a part of the family we made together. I should have known that he wasn't ready for a child. How would I know that when we tried to get pregnant with for 6 months before I finally got pregnant.
It took everything I had to come to the conclusion that taking willow away from the dysfunction was better for her then us staying there even if that did mean she would be from a broken home.
A few months after willow and I moved back in with my mom I met an old friend from middle school. At the time he was going through the exact same thing with his wife. Only thing different was that they had not had a biological child together instead they adopted a baby boy that a women was planning on just leaving at the hospital. His wife had been coming back and forth and kept running out on him with his son and even though he still signed the adoption papers on him because he loved him already.
When we met it was so easy to talk to him because I felt like he and I could relate to each other. We formed a very strong friendship and kept each other going through the stressful times. After a while it just turned into more then that and we moved in together. He was so great with willow and treated her like she was his own. Since willows father was not coming around I loved that for her!
Shortly after we moved into our house I found out I was pregnant. From that exact moment it felt like things just clicked! We became the strongest family anyone could ever imagine! I can't even think of a better father for my kids! On December 24th of 2011 I had a little brown haired blue eyed girl and named her Meadow Elizabeth Hulsey.
Now Jesse and I are planning a wedding for next spring and it's the most overwhelming experience! Since I stay at home with the girls now instead of working all I can think about is what if I spend all of this money on this day that is supposedly to be the day of my dreams and it just isn't what I dream it to be. I worry about what our finances will look like after this and if Jesse will be able to make enough to support us. He has done a wonderful job so far but we have had some very stressful times. I guess everyone has those worries sometimes though. We'll see how it all plays out.
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